9. Sorry. I must have left my wallet and credit
cards at home.
10. You just have to believe me when I tell you nothing's wrong.
11. I'm ready to make
12. Except for a beer or two, I never drink.
13. My wife and I haven't had sex in years.
14. We'll get married as soon as I ...
15. I'll be home in twenty minutes.
16. It's not that I don't
care - I just have to spend more time with my kids.
17. I've only slept with maybe ten women in my entire
18. I've been celibate since we broke up.
19. I could never lie to you.
20. I can still last all night.
21. I always use a con-dom.
22. I can help you get a great job in my
23. I haven't seen her since she and I broke up.
24. I tested HIV
25. I haven't seen her since she and I broke up.
26. The only sexual fantasies I have are about
27. No, I don't think your thighs (stomach, breasts, hips, etc.) are too big.
28. I'm too
29. How could you think I'd be interested in her? She's your best friend.
30. When it comes to
oral sex, I'm the best.
31. I've never had any trouble keeping an erection before.
32. It's you and
me, babe - we'll make love all over Europe.
33. I'd never do anything to hurt you.
34. I want to grow
old with you.
35. Believe me, my wife and I live very separate lives.
36. Our having sex won't change a thing between
37. Don't worry, I've had a vasectomy.
38. I'm going to leave my wife.
39. You're nothing at all like my mother.
40. Your being a different religion doesn't matter to me.
41. It doesn't bother me that you make more money than I do.
42. Even without sex, we'd still be
43. I think older women are the most exciting.
44. I'm considered one of the top people (in my
field, in the company).
45. What attracts me to you is your mind.
46. We'll split all the child care
and household chores fifty-fifty.
47. Of course I don't mind that you didn't come.
48. I've never had
an affair before.
49. You're the only one who understands me.
50. I've never been in therapy.
51. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me.
52. No, I'm not seeing anyone else.
53. I haven't thought about her (old girlfriend) in years.
54. How many times do I have to tell you I'm
not having an affair?
55. Your career is as important as mine.
56. I promise you that I'll
57. I want us to remain close friends always.
58. My wife and I have an understanding.
59. You're wonderful; you deserve someone better than me.
60. I don't masturbate. 61. Let's be
62. When you walked through that door, I knew it was the real thing.
63. I'd like you
even if you were a man.
64. It's okay to be good looking, but looks just don't mean that much to me.
65. The difference between us will bring us even closer.
66. I spend everything I earn on you and the
67. No, I never said that.
68. You make me feel like a kid again.
69. I'm going out with the boys (to the gym, to the office).
70. I'll move wherever you want.
71. Of course I'm not bored with you.
72. As soon as I finish this project (get a promotion, a raise, make partner),
73. You've got more sex appeal in your little toe than my wife's got in her whole body.
74. It wouldn't be you and me anymore if I used one of those.
75. Let's pool our assets - whatever is mine is
76. I still find you just as attractive as the day I met you.
77. Divorce is the farthest
thing from my mind.
78. Sure, I'll watch the kids.
79. It's not just the sex I want, it's being close
80. We'll be spending a lot of time together when I retire.
81. You're the only reason I've
worked so hard.
82. If I didn't have all this work, you know I'd go with you and the kids to your mom's.
83. No one's ever turned me on like you do.
84. My boss says there's nothing to worry about.
85. I'll never tell.
86. Relax, she's just a friend.
87. This is just a temporary separation until
we get things worked out.
88. Your hair (dress, outfit) looks fantastic.
89. It was just sex - it
didn't mean a thing.
90. Of course I'm listening to what you're saying.
91. Come on in and we'll just
cuddle for a few minutes.
92. No, I don't think you're fat.
93. You're the woman I should have
94. I'm going to be focusing on my work for a while now.
95. I guarantee you, I'm not the
96. Your having kids has nothing to do with my not wanting to get married.
97. I'm not
ashamed of the way you talk (look, act, etc.)
98. It's nothing personal; I just don't like sharing my living space with
99. This time I'm really serious.
100. Honestly, honey, it's just for the guys - none of the
wives go to the conference.
101. I'll always take care of you.
Camera feature doesn't work. Insert another quarter
The Original Wonder Woman
She's really let herself go.
You eat, you die.
Worst Family Photo Prt. 1
To think such family exist.
On being black .Now show some happy faces..
I Feel Like A Pancake!
Squashing finally makes it's way to the mainstream through the medium of the daytime chatshow. It's only a matter of time before weird Japanese tentacle fetishes and other horrors are being beamed to
wow, check out the socks
Weird World Record
It's a pretty impressive party trick but probably not something that you'd bother putting on your CV. It's kinda hard to believe that there are more than one people competing for the head stair
I knew someone was watching me
Slutty Dog Costume
Makes your dog look slutty.
almost thought that was his nose for a min........ hahahahaha
Who's Gonna Catch It?
judging by where & how the hands are pointing, the guy at the back looking up with his mouth open is gonna get nailed
No wonder all the chicks dig batman
Fighting the invisible man is not easy.
Its a rising trend in japan.
When you get old you just don’t have to care anymore.
Girl Scares & Tazes Boyfriend
There is something wrong with society these days. Women have literally become too big for their boots, I think it is time to go back a step and put them right back in their place (the kitchen). Who's
The Easy Button
Yes you are.
You Can't Park There
I didn't think JCPenney sold planes. But the price was right so I took a chance. Thank God I saved my receipt.
Kicking in Spandex
Nice breasts, lady!
The Burgers Finally Got to Him
Ronald McDonald is now obese. And Asian.
Epic Window Art
It's amazing just how much fun you can have with just a window, landscape, and a few pens. From such simple things, a creative mind can conjure up and offer up a batch of greatness that truly has to
It is weird how addiction lead their life.
Sumo Wrestlers Knock Out Ref
The last time these guys knocked something out that quickly was when they attacked the buffet at the Bellagio.
Oh look its the new Israeli prime minister.... Bling Closby....
She seems focus on it
Captain Mellonhead is the super hero Stan Lee refuses to talk about.
Its a must buy, Its 3 in 1. Nothing to lose
kinda reminds you of skittles ,go taste the rainbow
Surprise Drum Solo Fail
This drum solo was obviously planned because of the spotlight being on him, but his reaction to the limelight probably wasn't planned. Credit to him though, he carries on with the show afterwards!
A weird gallery of those kinds of pics that simply can't fail but make you utterly baffled. It's pretty safe to say that there are some truly strange people out there doing some crazy things. You
probably live near some of them?
Awkward Statue Position
Looks like fire department has no funds for upgrade
Wipe Away Your Sins
If it was that easy there wouldn't be sins.
Customer should be thankful for not waiting too long. But be careful he might end up breaking yours
"Dad, careful. It's falling off"
Heating Up Pizza
No wonder flat iron got same shape of the pizza. It's for heating the tip of the pizza.
Run Through It
It wouldn't have been so bad if it wasn't diarrhea
How Many People In The Hole?
Hippies, hipsters, festival freaks, whoever they are they just keep on coming out of the opening in the ground. it's enough to boggle the mind. Just how many people are there in this hole?